Funny Valentine Poems

"Because Love and Laughs Go Together!"

FUNNY VALENTINE POEMS:

Kids messing about in the backs of cars, can sometimes cause accidents to happen

While accidents in the backs of cars, almost always cause kids to happen

-Paul Curtis

The next one comes from a newspaper that ran a competition asking for a poem with the most romantic first line, but the least romantic second line. Here are some of the entries they received, and they combined the lines into one poem:

I thought that I could love no other,

Until, that is, I met your brother.

Roses are red, violets are blue,

sugar is sweet, and so are you.

But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead,

the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.

Of loving beauty you float with grace.

If only you could hide your face.

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;

This describes everything you are not.

I want to feel your sweet embrace

But don't take that paper bag off of your face.

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes

Damn, I'm good at telling lies!

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife

Marrying you screwed up my life.

I see your face when I am dreaming

That's why I always wake up screaming.

My love, you take my breath away.

What have you stepped in to smell this way.

My feelings for you no words can tell,

Except for maybe "go to hell."

What inspired this amorous rhyme?

Two parts vodka, one part lime.

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